


Clint Barton Has The Best Work Stories

by ineffablesheep



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Based on a Tumblr Post, Clint's work life is a secret, Deaf Clint Barton, F/M, Family, Humor, Injury, Multi, National Transportation Safety Board - NTSB, because it's Clint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-19
Updated: 2015-12-19
Packaged: 2018-05-07 13:19:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5457875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ineffablesheep/pseuds/ineffablesheep
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Coming up with a plausible excuse for Clint’s frequent absences was difficult. Avengers business had him on call all hours and away for days or months at a time. A business man didn’t come home with a black eye and broken fingers. A professional fighter would be seen and known on the circuit, something that couldn’t be fabricated. A pilot, a police officer, a bouncer; Coulson could fabricate and forge documents and signatures and pay slips, but only if they could come up with a job.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Clint Barton Has The Best Work Stories

**Author's Note:**

> So a while back now there was a post floating around on tumblr about Clint needing a cover for his job so that when people ask his family where he is they have an answer. Someone asked spectralarchers if she'd write it and I volunteered to have a crack at it.
> 
> It took a long while but here it is at last :)

“So Laura, where’s that husband of yours gotten to?"

Laura looked up from her cup of tea to her old school friend. With the kids at softball practice, she’d taken the opportunity to take the drive to Tammy’s new place and to catch up with her. Tammy had a grin on her face. Laura had only introduced Clint to her once briefly, and in that time Tammy had managed to pick up on the fact that Clint was always injured, or about to be.

“I told you, he works for the NTSB. He was supposed to be off call this month but they had a serious plane crash over in Washington. Sounds like it’s all hands on deck.”

“Oh man, sorry, I forgot.” Tammy shuffled, concern crossing her face. “I gather it’s really serious if they’ve called him in. Does he specialize in anything?”

“Yeah. It’s hard to get into the area, so they needed someone who could skydive out of a helicopter and cross-country ski.”

 

_Clint came home from Northern Russia two weeks later, with a stubbed toe, split lip and a smattering of scratches._

 

Coming up with a plausible excuse for Clint’s frequent absences was difficult. Avengers business had him on call all hours and away for days or months at a time. A business man didn’t come home with a black eye and broken fingers. A professional fighter would be seen and known on the circuit, something that couldn’t be fabricated. A pilot, a police officer, a bouncer; Coulson could fabricate and forge documents and signatures and pay slips, but only if they could come up with a job.

It was Laura who suggested the NTSB. At a moment’s notice, Clint could be called on to fly across the country to crash sites in hard to reach locations. His strange skillset was a byproduct of years of adapting on the job, working with other retrieval experts to clean up and clear wreckage. It was the perfect cover, and a day later Coulson handed over a folder with Clint’s new job in it.

“So Cooper, what does your dad do for a living? I understand he couldn’t be here today.” Cooper’s teacher stands at her desk and gestures towards the adults gathered in the class for Parents’ Day. Eight year old Cooper stood alone in front of them, unbothered. Before he spoke, he ran through the conversation he’d had with mom in the car.

_“He works for the National Transportation Safety Board. Right now, he’s in New Zealand helping out as a specialist contractor. You got it, Cooper?”_

_“Yes mom. Can I tell them the tightrope one? Please?”_

_“Yep, that’s a good one for this. I’m sorry I can’t be in class with you today sweet, I can’t get out of this meeting. Can you be a brave boy and talk up there by yourself?”_

_“I’m not a baby mom!”_

_“I know Coop. Now knock them flat.”_

“My dad works for the National Transportation Safety Board.” Cooper stumbles a little on the words but doesn’t falter. “He stays in America most of the time but today he’s in New Zealand ‘cause they need his help.” He smiles proudly at the audience. There’s a soft murmur from the adults as they process what he’s said. Cooper is too distracted to notice his teacher’s insincere smile.

“Really?” She draws the word out. “And what does that mean? What does he do when he’s at work?”

“When bad stuff happens like plane crashes and boats sinking he goes and helps clean up. Sometimes he even saves people. My dad saved people when the storm trapped people on that mountain last winter and he cleaned up rocks after the storm too.” As far as Cooper is concerned, his dad is a hero for fighting with the Avengers. If it means he’s away often, at least other people get to be saved by his dad and aunty Natasha. He’s proud, of both the cover story and of the secret the family guards.

“Really? Was he part of the search and rescue teams?” The teacher questions on behalf of the audience. With the boy’s father not actually here it’s difficult to separate fact and fiction. But he just shakes his head.

“Nope. Dad went up in the storm and got people to safe places. Then he went up higher up the mountain and helped clean up a plane crash. He’s not scared of anything!” The teacher laughs uncertainly.

“Cooper, honey, no one could get up the mountain. I know your dad helped but they couldn’t get a helicopter up there, let alone your dad.” Cooper remained unfazed. Ignoring the awkwardly shuffling of the parents, he turned and faced the teacher.

“Actually, he walked up the chairlift wires. I asked mom about it this morning and she said he always wanted to be in the circus.”

 

_Cooper’s story wasn’t far from the truth. Clint had been up there at the time, on an undercover solo mission for S.H.I.E.L.D. If he pointed a couple of lost skiers in the right direction, what was the harm? After all, everyone knew it was impossible to survive up there on the mountain alone._

 

In the playground, Lila held court under a tree. A small court, consisting of Violet and Andy but today she reigned supreme. Dad was home and mom had told her the story about what dad had done at work. Six year old Lila knew the truth and she knew why she had to lie. This was one of the okay lies, mom and dad had told her; she was being brave and helping keep them all safe. Vi and Andy didn’t know about dad but they loved the stories she had.

“So dad went to this place where a plane crashed in the water and he was breaking it into really tiny pieces and then the plane caught fire and dad was stuck-”

“What happened what happened?”

“Did he dive off and thwim away on a thark?”

“Sharks are dangerous dolphins are way better!”

“Na ah! Tharkth can thwim really really fatht and can eat people!”

Violet, five years old and missing half her teeth already, loved sharks. Probably something to do with the fact that sharks had teeth her parents sometimes joked. Her dentists thought it was more to do with biting things.

“Shush I’m talking! My dad can run really fast and he ran and jumped through all the fire and then he dived in the sea and the plane exploded and went more on fire. Dad had to hide underwater for ages and hold his breath and swim away.” Lila paused to take a breath and saw the hopeful looks on her friends’ faces. “I dunno if he saw a dolphin or a shark, I’ll ask mom tonight.”

Andy and Violet’s parents never knew what to believe when they came home telling stories about what Lila Barton’s father did for a living. Violet’s thought she had one hell of an imagination, whereas Andy’s would just sigh and agree. Andy and Violet didn’t care. Lila always told the best stories.

 

_Clint surfaced, gasping for breath. In the distance the Russian embassy crackled and burned and all he could feel was relief. He had made it out, the information on the flashdrive in the bottom of his quiver. As he tread water he noticed a dark shape circle around him and rise to the surface. Shit, infiltrate and steal secrets from a Russian crime syndicate only to die by fish. Great. A fin broke the surface and Clint stopped moving, staying as calm as possible. The creature was close to eight feet long. Between the flickering orange light and the darkness that only midwinter could bring, he couldn’t tell if it was a shark or a dolphin, either way it wouldn’t bat an eye if it decided he was worth eating. Not food, not food, I’m tough and stringy I promise! Almost as if it could understand him the creature, whatever it was, circled once more and then slipped back under the surface. Breathing easier now he radioed in to Coulson, giving his location as best he could._

_Once on board the helicopter, he asked if anyone knew if sharks or dolphins lived around these parts. Put it in t_ _he briefing next time, if you go in the water be prepared for death by giant fish! Coulson looked at him, a serious expression on his face. There’s no dolphins, or sharks, around these parts Clint. Too far north, too cold. Whatever, it had a fin and didn’t eat me. Good priorities, Barton._

 

Not all of Clint’s escapades with the NTSB had such great stories to tell and most didn’t make it to Lila and Cooper’s ears. Yes, Clint could throw knives, but there was no way he was going to tell them about the mission in which he had to resort to it when his bow was destroyed and communications down. And sometimes, no matter how hard he tried, there was no way even Clint could construct a story that could spare his dignity.

 

Dressed in jeans and medical gauze, he stood on the edge of the small crowd that made up the school PTA. Laura was in her element here. Clint watched as she delegated and coordinated other parents and stray teachers into setting up the staffroom, passing around tea, and herding them into seats. When she looked over at him (after finding the chairwoman’s notes for the second time) she smiled and he grinned back at her. Clint blew her a kiss and she waved a hand, inviting him over to a seat near her. With S.H.I.E.L.D. keeping him coming and going, he couldn’t always be as involved in Lila and Cooper’s lives as he wanted to be. So when he was on holiday or had some down time he jumped at every chance.

Clint ended up sitting next to a middle aged man wearing an excessive amount of tweed.

“New ______! _____ take it ______ _______ joined?” Frowning, Clint silently cursed his hearing aids. They were his back up set and not as sensitive as he was used to. Tony had made him some that could handle Avengers work and produced a clearer sound, but they were currently at the bottom of a duck pond. Long story.

“Sorry, could you repeat that please?” Tweed Man nodded and grinned, turning his face to Clint properly. Clearly, Clint thought, someone in this guy’s life was hard-of-hearing too. Of course Laura had wanted him to sit here.

“_____ noticed you’re a new face, have ____ just joined?” Clint smiled. He subtly signed “I love you” across the circle to Laura.

“Nah, I travel a lot so I can’t come often. I’m Laura’s husband, Clint.” He said as way of explanation. That seemed to do the trick as Tweed Man’s eye’s opened in recognition.

“Oh! _____ _____ remember now, Laura said you’d be _____ tonight. Neil______, nice to meet you.”

“Likewise.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, what did you do to your arm?” Clint flicks his gaze down to the thick layer of bandage on his left arm. He and Laura had agreed on a story for this one, even if it wounds Clint’s pride a little (a lot). He looks back up at Tweedy Neil.

“Work, believe it or not. This little two-seater Cessna had stalled and crashed in pretty dense bush.”

“Yeah? What happened?” Clint grinned.

“Well, we didn’t know that there was a summer camp on a couple of klicks west. So the team get dropped in, get to work cutting it into chunks and picking up glass, and I see something red in the bushes. Thought it might be wreckage or a body and went to have a look. Next thing I know I’ve been shot with an arrow and I’ve fallen down a bank, dislocated my shoulder. Turned out a few of the kids had nicked a couple of bows and snuck off.”

By now Tweedy Neil’s eyes look like they’re about to fall out of his head, so Clint figures he’d better run damage control.

“They didn’t mean to. Think I gave them a fright. And the bank wasn’t that high.”

When Tweedy Neil next spoke, his voice had gone up a notch and he couldn’t meet Clint’s eyes.

“Is_____, I mean, do you normally _____ hurt like that?”

“Sometimes, not always.” Clint keeps his voice low as the meeting around them starts in earnest. “It’s a dangerous job.” This doesn’t seem to help as Tweedy Neil still looks faint. Weak stomach.

“Where _____ you work ____ what are your qualifications?”

“Oh, the National Transportation Safety Board. I have a helicopter license and have experience with big cats. The area’s full of mountain lions.”

Clint caught Laura’s eyes across the room. She looked from him to Tweedy Neil and back again, and Clint could tell she was trying hard not to laugh. He grinned and shrugged, then settled in to listen.

 

Clint got a text later that night, as he sat on the front porch of the farmhouse cleaning his bow. He pulled out his current burner phone, hidden from the world curtesy of Stark. Wary of the unknown number he opened the message.

**A kid at summer camp huh? Here’s me thinking that someone got the jump on you and stabbed you with your own arrow**

Grinning, he replied.

_Fuck off Romanoff. Do I need to remind you of Budapest? :P_

He sits on the porch for another five minutes before he gets a reply.

**Birdbrain XD**

**Tell Laura I love her. Will be home soon x**

_Will do. Be careful Tasha x_

**Author's Note:**

> This started out as a kind of 5+1 and then my love for the Barton family (including Natasha) decided it needed to be a part of this. Claurasha can be read as Claura if it's not your cup of tea (but Claurasha is beautiful and I'll fight you on that one)
> 
> Fun fact! This is the longest piece I've written ever!


End file.
